Blogroll?
- Have you ever eaten a stale donut in the dark?
- Have you ever taken expired drugs?
- Have you ever broken a bone or a boner?
- Have you ever dressed up like the back brace girl from Sixteen Candles?
- Have you ever set a kitchen fire?
- Have you ever dressed up to go to Safeway in case the firemen are there?
- Do you like tacos?
- Are you a sporadic vitamin taker?
- Do you think Hawaiian pizza is a crime against nature?
- If I asked you right now in what aisle I might find arm braces in Target, would you know?
If you answered yes to any of these questions, you can be on my blogroll. If you said no to all of the above, I can’t help you and neither can anyone else. Otherwise tell me in the comments.
{ 50 comments }
I answered 8 of the 10 yes. Does that make me blog roll worthy?
1-yes, 2- duh yes, 3- too many bones to mention but I try not to break boners, although there was an incident in the 80’s.. shhhh 4- I will not dignify that question with a response. 5-Yep blew up my house with bug spray, did you know that can jettison you out your french windows of the breakfast nook? 6- I haven’t been to a safeway but when I worked at Public Safety I would wear makeup to bed, in case there was an emergency and the hot guys I worked with at Police and fire had to break into my house at night. 7-yeah but soft tacos ring my bell. 8- I take my Rx vitamins when I remember like once or twice a month. 9- I want to find the person who thought pineapple goes on pizza and punch him in the throat. 10- yeah it’s in the medicine section, next to the canes and Epsom salt, they keep all their braces there, finger, arm, leg the works, who needs a doctor..
Yes to 2, 3, 5, 7, 8, and 9. I’m a recent reader and Twitter follower, and I really enjoy your blog. Mine, however, has been neglected lately, but that will be remedied soon.
gaerga I really thought you said “Have you ever experienced a boner.”
I was like “UHHH HOW DO YOU SAY THAT YOU HAVE EXPERIENCED BONERS BUT YOU DON’T WANNA SOUND LIKE A WHORE?
And I totally take like 45 vitamins a day.
So
Blogroll me, baby?
I’ve only answered Yes to five of them, but I’m staying on the blogroll and you can’t shake me without a restraining order. The call is coming from inside the house, Tara.
Julie the Wife, I’m wondering if you’d let me use “You can’t shake me without a restraining order” as my new tagline.
Who HASN’T eaten a stale donut in the dark?
If it’s expired just take more of ‘em in case they’ve lost potency.
Broken a bone or boner? My own, or someone else’s? Yes, and maybe.
Not from 16 candles – but form Romi and Michelle’s high school reunion.
Yes, I’ve set a kitchen fire, but more importantly, I put it out. (Had I not been so flustered, I would have waited for the hot firemen to come put it out for me) – which brings us to question 6 – WTF is up with the firemen always being at the grocery store? (I used to date one, and even HE didn’t know)
Tacos are awesome.
I still have half a bottle of prenatal vitamins from my first pregnancy – my daughter is now 4.
Pineapples don’t belong on ANYTHING, let alone pizza.
I can draw you a map of my local Target, complete with emergency exits – you know, in case a fire breaks out…
I once dressed up to give vitamins to a guy with a broken boner in Target. I may or may not have eaten tacos that day. That qualifies me for something, right? On second thought, maybe I just need to up my meds.
I should be working on my own blog right now, but I have a love of random and unrelated questions. This is way more important than my own blog.
1. Who has enough donuts left over for them to get stale? But, I once stood, 8 months pregnant, in front of my open refrigerator and ate all but two bites of a berry cobbler at 2AM. I left two bites so that no one would think I was a total pig. Six year later, I’m still resentful that I didn’t eat those last two bites.
2. That’s probably a yes, because I just two weeks ago actually looked at the bottles of OTCs that I had and about 90% of them expired somewhere around the time by six year old was two.
3. When I was three weeks away from giving birth to my oldest, he managed to crack one of my ribs. Because he hated me. There was no other explanation. He’s okay about me now, but he’s 14 so that should change by Saturday. Does my rib count? And really, what else could you say but yes? I was a pregnant woman with a cracked rib. You can’t deny me that!
4. Sure, we’ll call it “dress-up”.
5. I once set TEA on fire. You’d be surprised at how many people tell me that’s just not possible. Or maybe you wouldn’t. Anytime someone tells me it’s not possible that I set tea on fire, I offer to go into their kitchen and make them some tea.
6. Well, the firemen eat breakfast at the dive next door to the office, so I wouldn’t have to go ALL the way to the grocery store. But I’ve dressed up to go to the grocery store at strategic times for other handsome guys.
7. I make amazing tacos.
8. If by sporadic you mean, “I have them and I took them the first two days after I bought them”, then yes, I’m a sporadic vitamin taker.
9. It’s not nearly as horrific as when someone puts sardines on a crust and call it pizza. Not only does this happen, people take pictures of that crap.
10. Feh, don’t get out. I’ve got a couple (ok, fine, SEVEN) in the closet. Take your pick. It’s quicker sympathy than having to drive to Target first. Unless you were only using that as an excuse to hit the bulk jelly bean bins. In which case – as you were.
1. Yes
2. Mushrooms are a fungus, does that count?
3. I think my husband’s ex actually broke his boner. Can’t take credit for that.
4. Really? You too?
5. I put one out. I’m kind of bad ass in the kitchen
6. Safeway, Lowe’s, Chuckey Cheese……..
7. Yes
8. I mean to every morning, even have a little alarm set but forget anyway until I’m at the office hitting the snooze button for the third time. Note to myself: I should bring my vitamins to work
9. You have to give them credit for trying to get kids to eat fruit.
10. Yes, read the second comment by ThePeachy1
Have you ever eaten a stale donut in the dark? – Not sure, but the answer is probably yes because I’m fat.
Have you ever taken expired drugs? Yes. I have Vicodin from 2005. It’s my “last resort” stash.
Have you ever broken a bone or a boner? Yes, I’ve broken my own bones, I’ve broken my childhood BFF’s arm AND I’VE SEEN A BROKEN BONER. At least it looked broken when we got there. Thank you fire department, for enriching my life by allowing me to see a broken boner. <—That alone should get me the top spot on the blogroll.
Have you ever dressed up like the back brace girl from Sixteen Candles? No
Have you ever set a kitchen fire? Inside no. Outdoor kitchen (okay, it was just the gas grill), yes.
Have you ever dressed up to go to Safeway in case the firemen are there? Uh, I WAS the Fire(wo)Man. No need to get all dolled up for myself.
Do you like tacos? Does a bear shit in the woods, Tara?
Are you a sporadic vitamin taker? Sporadic like once a year or so? Yes.
Do you think Hawaiian pizza is a crime against nature? Dear God, yes. Same goes for whole wheat crust. *thehumanity
If I asked you right now in what aisle I might find arm braces in Target, would you know? I'm pretty sure it's with the BenGay and shit, right?
ok. im not gonna lie. i LOVE hawaiian pizza. i also love crimes against nature tho, so… go figure.
tacos are my #1 favorite food group and i either take eleventy-seven vitamins at once or none at all.
that’s just how i roll…
i am probably the most tardy (as in both late to the party AND retarded) blog reader so, although i’ve been to your site quite a few times before (thanx to your friending me on facebook, HOLLA!!!) i’ve never commented before today.
so here i am, commenting on your “blogroll?” page like i’m a lazy ‘tute lookin for some undeserved love from my kind-hearted pimp who was just tryin’ to get my azz out the ghetto and now i expect penthouses and pedicures without ever having to walk the ho-stroll.
seriously though, you are hilarious and i’ll be comin’ back fo mo fo sho.
yo.
Yes to #1,2,6,7, & 9
Have you ever eaten a stale donut in the dark? Not that I remember
Have you ever taken expired drugs? Pretty much always
Have you ever broken a bone or a boner? Yes
Have you ever dressed up like the back brace girl from Sixteen Candles? Not YET
Have you ever set a kitchen fire? Almost. I left boiling water on the stove for like 3 hours once.
Have you ever dressed up to go to Safeway in case the firemen are there? No, but I wish that would motivate me to dress nice because I am totally like those people on What Not to Wear when I go to the grocery store.
Do you like tacos? Yes please
Are you a sporadic vitamin taker? I eat one Flintstone vitamin about once a month. Is that sporadic enough?
Do you think Hawaiian pizza is a crime against nature? Hellz no. I think it is delicious.
If I asked you right now in what aisle I might find arm braces in Target, would you know? I have a pretty good guess. I know it’s near the pharmacy.
Have you ever eaten a stale donut in the dark? Probably. That sounds like a Drunk-capade to me.
Have you ever taken expired drugs? Yes. I mean. It’s not like the grow mold…right??!?!
Have you ever broken a bone or a boner? Arm and tailbone. No boners as of yet, but I’m young.
Have you ever dressed up like the back brace girl from Sixteen Candles? No. Should I?
Have you ever set a kitchen fire? I’m confused, is this asking, have I ever set a kitchn on fire on purpose or have I caught the kitchen on fire? And how much fire = “on fire”?
Have you ever dressed up to go to Safeway in case the firemen are there? No. Fireman in my town are not hot.
Do you like tacos? OH MAN OH MAN OH MAN OH MAN YEESSSSSSS I love him. I could eat them everyday.
Are you a sporadic vitamin taker? Yarse. I take iron daily because I’m anemic but I’ve missed two of the past three days, so…sporadic?
Do you think Hawaiian pizza is a crime against nature? Dude. I love ham. I love pineapple. I love pizza. Sorry.
If I asked you right now in what aisle I might find arm braces in Target, would you know? Would I know the exact aisle number? No. Could I find them speedy quick using intuition and maybe my GPS Whitney? Yes.
what the fuck is a blogroll? I answered no to most of your questions, but if the question had been “do you find it hilarious that someone you know has done/thought all of the following and do you enjoy reading about it when you are supposed to be working?”, the answer would be yes, yes, oh gawd yes.
Umm… does it count that the only vitamins I can take are Flintstone Gummies? It’s cuz grownup vitamins taste like FAIL and chalk. Does this make me blogroll-worthy? Please say yes! *puss in boots eyes*
4/10
Dude I said yes to like, ALL of those. I broke my back when I was twelve and had to wear a brace from pits to snatch for seven months and can even say yes to the back brace girl one (what I had to do SOMEthing for Halloween).
1. Have you ever eaten a stale donut in the dark? – duh, who hasn’t
2. Have you ever taken expired drugs? – what’s today?
3. Have you ever broken a bone or a boner? -yup and yup
4. Have you ever dressed up like the back brace girl from Sixteen Candles? – only when she is dancing
5. Have you ever set a kitchen fire? no/yes – well, my sister’s easy bake oven
6. Have you ever dressed up to go to Safeway in case the firemen are there? – again, duh who hasn’t
7. Do you like tacos? – soft, only soft tacos
8. Are you a sporadic vitamin taker? – as in never, yes
9. Do you think Hawaiian pizza is a crime against nature? – only when the pineapples are really hard, then I am ticked
10. If I asked you right now in what aisle I might find arm braces in Target, would you know? – no because I just wonder every aisle of Target taking in all it’s beauty.
Did I pass? Was this a test because I hate tests and well, never do well so give a girl a break will you?
Numbers 2, 6, 7 and 8 are basically woven into the very fiber of my being but I’m definitely sad to hear about your feelings toward Hawaiian pizza.
Can we still be friends?
In response:
Have you ever eaten a stale donut in the dark? Yes. Half a box. Which I then blamed on the dog, because I couldn’t tell my husband I ate them all.
Have you ever taken expired drugs? Yeah but if you take a bunch they work just the same!
Have you ever broken a bone or a boner? I fractured my wrist once. I haven’t broken any boners that I know of..yet. Luckily. Because that would prob be MORE painful for me than it was for the boner. I don’t want to think about it, it makes my vajajay cringe.
Have you ever dressed up like the back brace girl from Sixteen Candles? No..I never even saw that movie. I have dressed up like a goth dominatrix and visited my then-fiancee at the elementary school where he worked carrying a giant stuffed Pikachu. Does that count?
Have you ever set a kitchen fire? Maybe once or twice..when I was trying to boil water maybe. Can’t say for sure.
Have you ever dressed up to go to Safeway in case the firemen are there? YES!
Do you like tacos? Tacos, esp Chipotle tacos, are deliciousness and should be eaten every change you get. Especially with avocado and tons of sour cream!
Are you a sporadic vitamin taker? Yes..I pop Flinstones when I remember to give them to my 3 yr old. They taste like gritty, minerally candy.
Do you think Hawaiian pizza is a crime against nature? I’m starting to, because all we ever get to eat here is cheese pizza.
If I asked you right now in what aisle I might find arm braces in Target, would you know? I WOULD!! TARGET IS LOVE!!!!
So can I be on your blogroll? Only 1/2 my posts are emo, the rest are completely random and whacked out and make NO SENSE. Which makes me incredibly happy. Woo!
Oh yeah to 7, 8 & 9. The rest is ‘no’ because I’m not a mental, okay? OKAY???
hawaiian pizza is wrong. fruit doesn’t belong on pizza. it belongs in cocktails, upside down cakes, pies, danishes, tarts, cobblers, yogurt dips, and cups. isn’t that enough! i’m a purist when it comes to pizza. that means tomato sauce, cheese, and pepperoni. and by all means don’t put thai chicken on a pizza. that goes a skewer. when things aren’t broke, people, don’t try to fix em. doh.
I’m SO on this – please pick me.
1. once. At bandcamp.
2. yep. Like 5 minutes ago. A Percocet from 2008.
3. not the bone, maybe the boner.
5. abso-fucking-lootly. A dish towel, wrong burner turned on. Mom ran from the bathroom half naked to put it out with her wash cloth, that was covering the naked part.
6. I wish I could say yes. I so wish I could say yes. But we do not have Safeway
7. what kind? Fish tacos are evil.
8. totally. I’m still on the jar or prenatals from 3 years ago.
9. why is it Hawaiian when they use Canadian bacon?
10. DUH!
1. Not in the dark, no. But with the curtains drawn.
2. I just did that yesterday.
3. Not yet. I almost cut off the back of my left heel with a piece of broken china, though.
4. Nope. Have you ever come to work on Hallowe’en in normal street clothes, and when people asked you where your costume was tell them that you’re a serial killer, and they look like everyone else?
5. Not on purpose.
6. We don’t have a Safeway here. I think I’m missing out.
7. Oh my, yes.
8. Yup.
9. Absolutely! Pineapple? Ham? On a pizza? Ew.
10. I’d know which side of the store to aim for. I tend to wander around in the bedding section, talking myself out of buying every single item in the Simply Shabby Chic line. Sometimes it doesn’t work so well
I’d faareaking love to be on your blogroll, almost as much as I enjoy taking and quite frankly, dispensing expired drugs. Cough syrup, yum yum yum.
I also like tacos. I’m way too much a prude for some of the other stuff though (lie).
Burritos are a crime against nature. Everything should come in the form of tacos. Fact.
3, 7, 9 are total Yeses! well 3 is more of I fractured my elbow because my sister pushed me off our back deck upnorth when I was younger (over a crayon apparently). Don’t worry we’re on a hill and the back deck isn’t that far off the ground but still far enough to fracture bones.
1. Have you ever eaten a stale donut in the dark? Does floating in outer space count as the dark? Then yes, but it may have been a hallucinated side effect of some anxiety pills I took.
2. Have you ever taken expired drugs? Drugs don’t expire, silly. They get better with age, like wine.
3. Have you ever broken a bone or a boner? Yes and no, respectively.
4. Have you ever dressed up like the back brace girl from Sixteen Candles? No, but I totally want to now.
5. Have you ever set a kitchen fire? Yep, and my cat was co-arsonist.
6. Have you ever dressed up to go to Safeway in case the firemen are there? I don’t have hot firemen in my Safeway, but I would totally walk up to them wearing my cutest shorts and say “Is that the jaws of life you have there or are you just happy to see me?”
7. Do you like tacos? I am learning to program right now and NO KIDDING, five minutes ago I was testing out the print function so I wrote print(“I love to eat tacos because tacos are the most delicious”)
8. Are you a sporadic vitamin taker? I have a bottle that looks at me woefully because I don’t pay it enough attention.
9. Do you think Hawaiian pizza is a crime against nature? Pigs and pineapple both start with “p”, so they totally belong together on a pizza. (Alphabetized meals are the most nutritious.)
10. If I asked you right now in what aisle I might find arm braces in Target, would you know? The same one where I bought my knee brace probably.
tl;dr: I’d love to be on your blogroll ^_^
I got one. I think that means I failed? I’m not so good with math.
I don’t know what a blogroll is, but I don’t want to have to go to jail to get on it.
But I DO like tacos, especially in the nighttime.
1. Man, I want a donut.
2. Probably, I don’t read expiration dates.
3. I am quite sure I’ve broken the latter, not mine, of course. Shush.
4. No, I’m a disappointment, aren’t I?
5. I am pretty sure I am not allowed in the kitchen anymore.
6. The firemen in this area are NOT attractive. I accidentally dated one and it was a fucking terrible experience anyway.
7. Yes! When we were poor, we had Taco Tuesday every week as our only respite from Ramen and Peanut Butter sandwiches Day, which was every other day.
8. YES. I bought a gigantic thing of prenatal vitamins when I was pregnant with E thinking, “Oh hey, I’m knocked up and cheap, so I’ll just get a new gigantic bottle every few months, score!” I am still on that first bottle despite TWO YEARS of breastfeeding.
9. I don’t know, I REALLY like pizza in all its forms, so I’m not too terribly offended.
10. Probably, and the sad thing here is that our nearest Target is half an hour away and yet I still visit with alarming frequency.
1. I don’t know about a stale donut in the dark, but I did eat a whole bag of powdered donuts. I also was too lazy to get a bowl for some cake and I didn’t want to do any dishes so I grabbed a plastic cup and shoved the cake in the cup.
2. Definitely… expiration dates are only suggestions.
3. Not a bone… But prolly a boner.
4. No, but in middle school they told me I may have scoliosis.
5. I’m a bit of a pyro… so it was probably accidentally on purpose.
6. We don’t have a Safeway, but I would take the route by the firehouse to get to school because they would be outside cleaning their hoses.
7. YES
8. Yes
9. I’m a fan actually.
10. Yes, I have two wrist braces. I’ve been to Target like three times in one day.
I anwered 9 out of 10 yes. The only thing I had to answer no to was number 4. Does dressing up as Molly Ringwald come close enough? Additionally per your new requirements, I have been to jail (though it was only for about 2 hours while I waited for bail) and been on probation…I kick these requirements ass!
Have you ever eaten a stale donut in the dark? No… wait, yes… but I was also drunk at the time so I can’t verify if it was stale because it tasted like the best donut on the planet to me, at that time.
Have you ever taken expired drugs? You know, I really think we get attached to these “expirations”. I think its just an elaborate ploy for the drug companies to get more money out of us for buying additional medication when the old stuff is perfectly fine, I think. Also, I’m growing antlers. But I don’t think the two are related.
Have you ever broken a bone or a boner? Do toes count? If no, then no. But I’ve busted a couple boners, being a resident assistant then a hall director for many years.
Have you ever dressed up like the back brace girl from Sixteen Candles? Joan Cusack rocks the free world. But sadly, no.
Have you ever set a kitchen fire? *Allegedly*
Have you ever dressed up to go to Safeway in case the firemen are there? Wait, there are firemen at Safeway? Uhhhhh, when were you going to tell me?? You holding out on me?!?
Do you like tacos? I’ve lived 45 minutes from Mexico my entire life. Yes, I like tacos.
Are you a sporadic vitamin taker? Complusive more like it. I don’t know why.
Do you think Hawaiian pizza is a crime against nature? Hells to the yes! Ew ew ew, no fruit on pizza, period. End of conversation.
If I asked you right now in what aisle I might find arm braces in Target, would you know? It depends, it is the Target on Ina or the Target on Broadway. But don’t go to to Target on Grant… goddamn whores.
This is really competitive and makes me so nervous.
1. I’ve eaten stale donuts but probably not in the dark because one time someone told me about getting donuts from a vending machine and eating them and thinking they tasted a little funny then discovering they weren’t powdered donuts, they were covered in mold. And since then I really closely inspect my donuts.
2. I’ve taken expired drugs UP THE ASS.
3. I’ve broken bones, some of them my own.
4. I would never mock a back brace wearer (at least not publicly) because my sister broke her back and had to wear one of those massive braces for several months of her junior year in high school.
5. I haven’t *intentionally* set a kitchen fire… but the kitchen has happened to catch fire while I’ve been using it.
6. I don’t go to Safeway, and usually firemen don’t do it for me. But I dress up to go other random places to make up for the times I went to those places without plucking my unibrow/wearing a bra/bathing. I like to really “wow” people with the before and after.
7. I do like tacos.
8. My vitamin ingestion is sporadic at best.
9. Hawaiian pizza is an abomination.
10. I can’t tell you the aisle number at Target. I’d have to go with you. I have a Target-related homing system in my brain that enables me to locate any product in any Target, just by scent. (Or something.) Some people call this “store planning” or “merchandising” but I call it a fucking kickass talent that only I have.
Yes, I’ve take expired medicine, set a kitchen fire, like tacos and take vitamins sometimes. I don’t know where the braces are and I worked at a Target, ugh. I was in clothes and baby though. I also have eaten stales donuts but it wasn’t dark. I really enjoy your blog. I found about it through the Bloggess’.
Dear bedbugs,
1. I have never let a doughnut live long enough get stale. No doughnuts left behind.
2. Drugs, food, relationships…anything past it’s prime is about right for me.
3. I’ve broken a boner, like, emotionally. It’s more of a wither than a crack, but I think it counts.
4. No, but I DO like to do Ducky’s dance from Pretty in Pink alone in my living room.
5. Chicken breast stuffed with spinach and goat cheese wrapped in bacon. At the moment when I should have been deciding if it’s baking soda or baking powder you throw on a grease fire I was shouting “GREASE FIRE! GREASE FIRE!” and then grabbed it with my hands and blew it out like a birthday cake. No moustache wax that week.
6. I’m not into firemen. I have dressed up only because I thought putting clothes on and leaving the house before dinner time would make me feel better about my life. Wrong.
7. Love. Miss desperately. Currently in South Korea where fermented cabbage is the snack choice of 50 million people.
8. I take them after I get sick, when it’s already too late, and then complain that they’re not working.
9. No. Hawaiian pizza is God’s way of saying, “Sorry I tricked you back there in the garden. Since you’ve been banished, please accept this free gift of pineapple on your pizza.”
10. Originally from Canada, currently in South Korea, never seen a Target with my own eyes. When in doubt, take three consecutive lefts.
Respectfully yours,
bisforcookie
6 out of 10. maybe 7? I never broke a bone, but I did tear some ligaments for which I was in plaster for almost a month. Should’ve been 2 weeks, but we pretended I fell one day in order to skip work in the afternoon (going to the doctor and all), and then of course, I really hurt it because Karma is such a constant friend of mine.
Most probably I could tell you which aisle in Target if South Africa had a Target. Suppose ours is called Pick and Pay? in that case, another yes.
Whether or not I land on your blogroll, I love your blog and will continue reading it. Forever and ever. Or at least until you stop writing.
1.Have you ever eaten a stale donut in the dark? Yes indeed.
2.Have you ever taken expired drugs? Definitely.
3.Have you ever broken a bone or a boner? What really sucks is when a girl loses her rhythm on top and lands on your boner with her region between the vagina and bunghole (forget what that region is called, I know it’s not a “choad.”) You feel as if you literally break your boner and that has happened to me a few times. Oh, and my cheekbone was broken due to being beaten with brass knuckles and steal-toed boots. I’m a real winner. Yes to this one.
4.Have you ever dressed up like the back brace girl from Sixteen Candles? I can’t say I have.
5.Have you ever set a kitchen fire? Inadvertently. Yes.
6.Have you ever dressed up to go to Safeway in case the firemen are there? Firemen are not my type.
7.Do you like tacos? Depends on the hygiene. Wait a sec big guy, that’s disgusting. Soft shell supreme from Taco Bell always do the trick.
8.Are you a sporadic vitamin taker? Sporadic is the perfect way of describing when I take vitamins.
9.Do you think Hawaiian pizza is a crime against nature? Hell no. Hawaiian pizza is the epitome of nature. Even better yet, Hawaiian bbq chicken pizza.
10.If I asked you right now in what aisle I might find arm braces in Target, would you know? No, because I have extremely mobile, powerful and indestructible arms…..never needed an arm brace.
6/10…… Wow, a D- according to most grading scales. Thanks for the self-esteem booster, bedbug biter!
1. Yes, but not in the dark, in the car while not looking at them because I was “keeping my eyes on the road.”
2. Yes, because my mom told me they “make expiration dates up” and I still believe that. Except the tylenol PMs we have that say they expired in 2008 really seem to have expired, which is disappointing at 3am.
3. No, I’m big into getting bruises and stitches though. Also, I worked at planned parenthood where I learned you can’t actually “break” it, no matter what he says.
4. No, but my desire to sew is derived almost entirely from Andie’s sewing scene in Pretty in Pink.
5. Does burning yourself with oil splatterings count? Probably not.
6. No, but only because Vermont doesn’t have Safeways.
7. Yes.
8. Yes. Real conversation had today with my nurse: “are you taking anything else regularly?” me: “not so much regularly, but I take a lot of things sometimes.” Her: judgmental look.
9. Yes, but I don’t like ham on anything, even a ham sandwich.
10. No (see answer 6, again, VT doesn’t have a target, no joke). I would however point behind me and say that they’re “right over there by the sporting stuff.”
Your blog is fabulous. My blog is about things made by my sewing machine (see answer 4 above), my typewriter and other fetching things. It is arguably (and not arguably) not funny. So I understand if it’s not a fit. Though it does rely on funny blogs, nonsequiturs and NPR to get made. And it likes to keep good company.
If this were an SAT test, I would have gone to Harvard. Number 4 I have not done, but love all John Hughes films so that has to count for half credit. Would love to be on your blogroll, so thanks for the opportunity! Have fun on your trip.
1. any donut is a good donut. stale or not.
2. I work in a pharmacy. so yes. and by now I have inhaled enough anti-psycotic med dust that I should be sane. It hasn’t worked yet.
3. yes. i am not telling you which!
4. no. but i might now
5. Does a bear shit in the woods? ok. sorry. that was rude. I set off the smoke alarm atleast once a month!
6. Dammit, we don’t have safeways where I live. but it used to be my favorite grocery store my grandparents shopped in. Besides Kroger. and the older I get the hotter firemen are. I had an aversion to them though since my dad, granddad and uncle we fire men.
7. yep
8. I think about taking vitamins. then I open the bottle and gag. I need gummy vitamins!
9. Not completely. But I only like pineapple all by itself. not on or in stuff. unless its on the edge of a frou frou drink that a cabana boy brings me.
10. probably. i worked retail forever and its pretty much all the same.
ok. i can’t believe i just did that so i could be on a blog roll. Couldn’t I just have asked nicely? ps. you have been on mine for months. Just sayin! You rock. thanks for the laughs
1. Not only have I been found eating stale donuts in the dark – who has time to find a light switch when you’re busy ‘tidying up’ the leftover Krispy Kremes – I’m the person who’s had to text friends asking if there’s a problem with inhaling 3 donuts in under 79 seconds.
I also have a job which involves plenty of contact with soldiers, sailors and flyboys – according to my boss, I’m now ‘assigned to my rostered position’, not ‘not heading out to shake Daddy’s moneymaker’, or ’seeing which service prefers blondes.’
2. Not intentionally… Till I realised it’s a helluva high!
3. No. Yes. Oh God, you promised you never mention it again!
4. Really?
5. If you asked my former flatmate, no. But I was there, baby – I’ve seen the terror.
6. I only shop in the supermarkets near the fire stations
7. Mmmm, tacos. Tacos are a food group, rite?
8. Sporadic vitamins? I’m more a multi-fit girl myself – when I remember to take them
9. I’m Australian – you roll with it, for fear of being deported
10. See above
1. yummy yummy krispy kremes
2. umm…that one time when I used the leftover lortab from my wisdom teeth surgery when I just wanted to sleep and couldn’t. they gave me 20 250mg and 10 500mg’s. note: not great to watch fantasia to fall asleep when on lortab. * the more you know **starswoosh** *
3. nope
4. have I ever seen sixteen candles?
5. yup. not as bad as my friend though. she set salad on fire. how, we’re still not sure.
6. complete 4″ pumps and plunging neckline. (i have pictures upon request)
7. who doesn’t?
8. yes
9. duh
10. aisle 24b
1. Have you ever eaten a stale donut in the dark?
oh, yes. certainly. probably in daylight, as well.
2. Have you ever taken expired drugs?
all the time. i have a whole shoebox full of them. need an oxycodone? i got ‘em.
3. Have you ever broken a bone or a boner?
not a bone. i have fractured and cracked several bones, never broken anything… so far.
4. Have you ever dressed up like the back brace girl from Sixteen Candles?
heh, no. but i would!
5. Have you ever set a kitchen fire?
yeah, i have. i can’t cook to save my life.
6. Have you ever dressed up to go to Safeway in case the firemen are there?
i’ve gone dressed up to wal-mart, for no damn good reason. and i’m talking prom dresses, here.
7. Do you like tacos?
i ADORE the mighty taco.
8. Are you a sporadic vitamin taker?
definitely. have loads of them, can’t ever remember to take them. then i’ll go on a 2 day healthy kick… and then back to the ignoring.
9. Do you think Hawaiian pizza is a crime against nature?
without a doubt. i just don’t like salty and sweet together.
10. If I asked you right now in what aisle I might find arm braces in Target, would you know?
not the number of the aisle… but i could lead you there, no problemo.
pretty please, put me on your blogroll! but… i will say, my blog is probably not safe for children, that is, if you don’t want them knowing lots of curse words. and about the existence of gay people. but other than that i’m reasonably harmless. : ]
cheers!
1. Yes. And I got busted too.
2. Yes. It’s more fun that way.
3. No. But I sprained both my arms at the same time by face-planting at school roller skating party.
4. Does having whiplash and sitting with a neck brace on my neck in my recliner for 2 weeks count?
5. Once. BUT IT WASN’T MY FUCKING FAULT!!
6. No. There is no Safeway where I live. I’m a loser.
7. Yes. Thank you for asking.
8. Yes. I actually placed my own label on my bottle of “Woman’s One A Day” that now says “One an every other 5th Wednesday”.
9. I have had American’s version of soggy pineapple, and crusty canadian bacon slapped together and I have to say, I’m not a fan.
10. No. I can’t. My trips to Target are few and far between because I get into trouble when I go in there.
I’ve never dressed up as backbrace girl (isn’t she Joan Cusack?), and I kinda like Hawaiian pizza, but otherwise I’m totes your girl.
1. Have I ever eaten a stale donut in the dark? That’s kind of personal, don’tcha think?
2. Have I ever taken expired drugs? Those expiration dates, they are really more like guidelines, aren’t they?
3. Have I ever broken a bone or a boner? Um, yes. One or the other.
4. Have I ever dressed up like the back brace girl from Sixteen Candles? Have to say no on this one, but it would have been tempting to me about 20 years ago.
5. Have I ever set a kitchen fire? No…at least not the entire kitchen.
6. Have I ever dressed up to go to Safeway in case the firemen are there? I don’t think you’ve seen the fireman in my town…it would be quite pointless really.
7. Do you like tacos? Natch. I just had them for dinner.
8. Am I a sporadic vitamin taker? I can make a bottle of vitamins last a couple of years. How’s that for sporadic? And those expiration dates are really more like guidelines anyway, right?
9. Do I think Hawaiian pizza is a crime against nature? Not if I’m eating it in Hawaii.
10. If you asked me right now in what aisle I might find arm braces in Target, would you know? Our town doesn’t have a Target. Does Wal Mart count? If so, then yes.
Would love to be on your blog roll, and add you to mine!
Comments on this entry are closed.