Hint of Penis Or Matt Dillon’s Housekeeper is a Narcolepetic

So looks like Cinderella will be running into her ex at Target.  If you don’t know what I’m talking about, you can catch up here.  I went to Target today and couldn’t decide on an ex-boyfriend.  For your consideration…

CANDIDATE #1

I have never seen Twilight.  I hear it is about zombies.  I like zombies very much – their endearing stumbly walk, their shedding skin – but this guy is quite pale and looks brooding which is not my thing.  Also, he might be wearing blush.  I am anti-blush for men, but again, this is your story, so if you’re okay with that, I’m okay with that.  How are his teeth? Because he’s not smiling – and I like good teeth.  Teeth all normal?   I don’t know if he has a penis. I did not undress him.  He may have “hint of penis” which I will explain below.

CANDIDATE #2

This is Ken.  Poor Ken.  It’s like he was never cool.  It’s hard not to have testicles, or even a penis and instead have what I call “hint of penis.” This is what the marketing people bandied about all those years ago when Ken was made.  Well he can’t have a real penis.  Yes, but he’s a man, he has to have something.  How about just a “hint of penis?” I was going to check to see if things had changed since I was a kid, but a lady was staring at me as I stood there snapping pictures of eunichs in boxes.  I’m not sure what to think about his hat, strange shirt and white sneaks.  It’s sort of a New Kids on the Block meets male nurse look.  And oh my God, I think the silver lettering running vertically up the box says HOTTIE.  Mmm I don’t know, he looks a little dated and lameish.  Well what if we just write on the box, HOTTIE.  Maybe we can sort of subliminally hint at it.

I’m being too harsh.  He does have one important thing going for him – 100 poses!  This will be good for lots of stuff, to be determined.  The Twilight guy looks a little stiff, not in his pants silly – remember he has “hint of penis”

So vote at the top right of the home page.

In narcolepsy news

The CPAP is used sporadically, and I can tell it’s on the way to being abandoned.  It seems to make him sleep worse.  While I’ve gotten used to sleeping next to snorkling Darth Vader, TBZE can’t get used to being snorkling Darth Vader.  However, though the ritalin was a massive fail, he is now on another drug which seems to be working. I think it’s about day 7, and so far I have not found him asleep on the garage floor which happened once.  So good news!

Side note, Matt Dillon’s housekeeper is narcoleptic.  But she’s super good so he doesn’t fire her.  She falls asleep while doing housework, making dinner, changing the sheets and so on.  Don’t ask how I know this, I can’t name names. But point is my zombie is in good company.  Also Eeyore.  No, he was not depressed. Note the sluggishness, the slurred speech.  And Sleepy the Dwarf from Snow White.  He wasn’t lazy!  Just a narcoleptic.  It’s hard having narcolepsy.  There are no narcolepsy fun runs, no triathalons, no trendy livestrong bracelets to show your support.  But at least we have Matt Dillon’s housekeeper.  There’s that.

Tagged as: Cinderella, narcolepsy, zombies